Ok, by now you should be able to tell that I have a distinct distaste for anything bankerish. Frank Capra’s characterization in “It’s a Wonderful Life” seems to have been about spot on for nearly all bankers. Herewith, I now share with you another enlightenment from Doonesbury. Enjoy:
HOW LITTLE WE KNOW
by Harry Browne
August 22, 1984
You’ve probably had the experience of reading a newsletter’s (blog’s) explanation of what is about to happen in the world. The writer presents a sensible, logical, compelling argument that something is inevitable based on what has gone before and where we are now. His case is so plausible and rational that it’s obvious he must be right.
But then you pick up another newsletter (blog) and find another preview of the inevitable -and it’s exactly opposite to the forecast in the first newsletter. And the second writer’s arguments are just as logical, sensible, plausible, and rational as the first writer’s.
Which one are you supposed to believe? The question could be critical. Each writer might be urging you to invest all your capital in line with his forecast. To choose wrongly could be disastrous.
So how do you decide which one of them is right? Read more…
Asset Allocation, Economics, Gold, Humor, Markets, Portfolio Management, Stocks
by Jonathan Clements
Wall Streeters talk a great game. The real challenge, however, is figuring out what they are really saying.
Below are 33 phrases often heard on Wall Street and how you might interpret them. The list was compiled with help from investment advisers William Bernstein, Eleanor Blayney, Harold Evensky, Deena Katz, Ros Levin, Gerald Perritt and Larry Swedroe. I also got a hand from Journal colleagues Greg Ip and William Power.
But my biggest debts are to Kevin Berozott, an investment adviser in Camarillo, Calif., and John Rekenthaler, research director at Chicago’s Morningstar Inc., both of whom shipped me e-mails filled with hilarious examples. Read more…
Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department
Sister Entities to Share Employees, Money
From The Borowitz Report
In what some on Wall Street are calling the biggest blockbuster deal in the history of the financial sector, Goldman Sachs confirmed today that it was in talks to acquire the U.S. Department of the Treasury.
According to Goldman spokesperson Jonathan Hestron, the merger between Goldman and the Treasury Department is “a good fit” because “they’re in the business of printing money and so are we.”
The Goldman spokesman said that the merger would create efficiencies for both entities: “We already have so many employees and so much money flowing back and forth, this would just streamline things.”
Mr. Hestron said the only challenge facing Goldman in completing the merger “is trying to figure out which parts of the Treasury Dept. we don’t already own.”
Goldman recently celebrated record earnings by roasting a suckling pig over a bonfire of hundred-dollar bills.
Elsewhere, conspiracy theorists celebrated the 40th anniversary of NASA faking the moon landing.
And in South Carolina, Gov. Mark Sanford gave his wife a new diamond ring, while his wife gave him an electronic ankle bracelet.
Foreign Exchange Quotes
